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In my younger days Valentine's day was not popular in India. However as I was growing up I saw it's popularity soar and knew it was a ploy by Archie's cards to sell more of their cards and gifts. They were a yuppie, premium brand that had come into the market.
St. Valentine
As many of you already guessed, originally Valentine's day had nothing to do with romantic love. St. Valentine was a third century Christian saint. In fact there may have been two or more saints with the same name and hence the confusion around the origins. So it is good we bring a deep ethos of love into the day and make it our own. We do not have to subscribe to past rituals that were dark but create more progressive and humane practices around it.
LINKS OF INTEREST:
https://www.history.com/news/6-surprising-facts-about-st-valentine
https://www.npr.org/2011/02/14/133693152/the-dark-origins-of-valentines-day
Inviting Ourselves Into Our Hearts
It is important to honour our humanness if we are to fully integrate. That means seeing our pain, trauma, hurt, betrayal and taking time to release, resolve and respond rather than overreacting to it.
However, that time for welcoming ourselves back home or coming back to "OM TRUTHS" is not valued in a society that prioritises productivity rather than integrity.
This unresolved aberration sits, festers and creates disconnection from the heart.
Disconnection From The Heart And Symptoms
1. Numb to life. Emotionally flat.
2. Hyper reactive.
3. Lack empathy.
4. Exhibit narcissistic behaviour.
5. If we are not honouring our own pain, then we can also move in this world by not honouring ourselves or having better boundaries.
6. Suppressing emotions, being afraid to face them.
7. Projections - Throwing fears from the past on an unsuspecting person.
8. Internalising pain and feeling worthless.
9. Imposter syndrome.
10. Self harm and more.
Healthy communication happens within first and then with others. When our internal wiring is good, then we make attempts to be in touch and reconnect and reconcile. This is very important to understand in a conflict resolution and reconciliation process.
The Power In Our Hearts
The heart has an electromagnetic field 5,000 times that of the brain and an electrical field 60 times that of the brain. That is a lot of times more!!
It is 40,000 neurons sending messages to the brain. Oxytocin or the love and bonding hormone is produced in the heart.
Gut - Heart And Heart - Brain Coherence
Ayurveda speaks of the gut - brain connection. Thankfully modern science is also in agreement recently. The vagus nerve, that connects the gut and brain, moves through this power electromagnetic field of the heart and is influenced by it. In yogic practices we are facilitating a communication coherence between all these areas.
The Wisdom Of The Ancient Researchers
The chakra system is a beautiful blue print of psychosomatic energetics. This means that our body and our mind are impacted by our energy and vice versa. This energy, or bio magnetic field, is called prana in Sanskrit and chi in Chinese. Prana flows through the pranamaya kosha (or the auric body) in pathways like rivers or rivulets. Just as nerves are in the physical body, these naadis are in the auric body (pranamaya kosha), which extends to around an arms length in all directions, for most people.
It is said the Bhuddha had a pranic field that was over a kilometer wide and some of his sensitised followers would know he was coming to their town to give a talk by tuning in. Have you wondered how dogs sense when we are coming home? There is a big hypothesis but no definitive answers. Since their sense of smell is strong enough to smell diabetes and cancer that could be a reason.
LINKS OF INTEREST:
https://www.cuteness.com/13429622/can-my-dog-sense-when-im-coming-home-before-i-even-arrive
https://thebark.com/content/how-do-dogs-know-we-are-coming-home
Stronger Senses
Each of our senses was also much stronger before industrialisation. One of my students still has the capacity to smell if someone is getting sick. He says the odour changes. I also have the capacity to smell shifts, however that skill was very pronounced in me as a child.
There are other senses also we may also develop when living a yoga life.
Almost all of my students, who have been committed to studying for a while, can sense prana in their palms and fingers if not their whole bodies. This takes a slowing and quietening down. Unfortunately modern life glorifies the other opposite of business, loudness and pomp.
These nadis (or pranic pathways) can get blocked due to various reasons causing disconnection and disease. They also converge at key points, just like nerves converge in the body to form a plexus or plexi. The most famous one is the solar plexus. The convergence points of nadis are called chakra. In Sanskrit this means a “wheel” or a “vortex.”
Anaahatha - Unstruck
The chakra around the heart area is called the anaahatha chakra. The element associated with it is air or vayu and the sense is touch or sparsha. That is why the heart chakra feels open when there is a conscious, loving touch.
Anaahatha means “unstruck.” What is the sound of one hand clapping? It refers to the sounds of not just celestial realms but of the quiet knowing of the heart. And for us to hear that deep voice we have to drop our arrogance and listen. This arrogance can come from many things including the illusion we know a lot. Anaahatha also means “unhurt” or “unbeaten.” It is the beautiful fullness of peace and serenity that the anaahatha makes available to us.
Impediments To Love
When we are disconnected then we can see how our perceptions of the world, ourselves and others are formed from ideas rather than a deeper knowing. This deep connection to life is what yoga helps us cutivate. The yogic practice helps clear attachment to constructs by tapping into the intelligence of the heart, that connects us to cosmic wisdom.
Reconnect To Your Heart
The yogic life is an invitation to reconnect to one's heart.
All of the Arkaya yoga processes invite you to that space. When you are there, you cannot but be humble. Yet we have the imprints of pain from the past which prevent us from accessing true humility.
We will look at simple practices in the Saturday satsangh to reconnect to the heart. A satsangh is a gathering of truth seekers.
Here is a simple mindfulness practice to facilitate that same reconnection to the heart:
Feel things against your skin. The touch of the breeze. Feel how your clothes feel against your skin. As you shower feel the water, feel the soap, feel the water.
Gently run your fingers across your arms and see how that feels. Use the sparsha mudhra or your palms and place them on any part of the body you feel, needs this conscious touch. It could be intuitive or it can be a part of the body that is in pain.
If you are partnered, then touch each other therapeutically first. Feel if your partner is holding tension in the body and gently or strongly press that area getting feedback from your partner. Rub their back like you rub a baby's back.
Once there is a therapeutic connection move to more affectionate touching or hugs. Once both of you feel you are ready to shift the energy then check in and see if you want to move to sensual touch. If not stay with the affection and therapeutic aspects of it.
We are not moving to sexual touch here and staying in this connected state for at least 20 mins.
Love Is Such A Hateful Word
This was the title of the poem I had written over twenty years ago, when I worked in film and advertising in Chennai, India. I was in my early twenties. I saw the word "love" being used not just flippantly but to manipulate. Some of what I witnessed and opened myself to jarred me and was very different from the protection and respect I had received from my grandfather during my upbringing.
I was running my own, financially successful, advertising and film production house and we also won awards. However the vapidness of it all hit me. I was a certified yoga teacher by then and taught yoga for free. However, being a workaholic, I was burnt out. I grew to run a company and was later joined by a business associate. I decided to leave it behind, as I was not only taking on more of the workload in the company but also saw the lack of integrity and how money and power got to his head. I was not going to put into a system I did not subscribe to. Also I was getting tired of kisses in the air and love being thrown around in the general atmosphere.
This is not my idea of love now. However, I see that it reflects what I saw then and is still relevant in some worlds. I have a business associate in India now, who has been a blessing and I am glad I have been able to manifest people of integrity in my life. This is a poem to remind myself, and possibly inspire others, that there is hope when we say no to something that does not serve our highest. Then, there is room for more beautiful things to come our way.
"Love" A Hateful Word
Love is such a hateful word, when used to manipulate.
A dark word it becomes when used to entangle me in dark worlds.
Love is such a hateful word when used to dictate, then maybe placate.
I pray the idea of love does not shackle me, may I not mistake it for dysfunctionality.
Oh shadow dancer, elusive lover, whose colours I do not see -
Only several shades of grey, depths of drama, that scorch stability.
Integrity! What is that? Cotton candy, powder puff, fluff is all I see
Maybe I am not looking hard enough, maybe I am the one, diseased
Yes it is moi, it is me, I am the one ill at ease with the charades, the misogyny,
Tired of the tyranny of superficiality.
I scream, I implode into the expanse.
I am now both connected to my pain and free.